


Almost

by micehell



Category: Trainspotting (1996)
Genre: Angst, Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-08
Updated: 2006-07-08
Packaged: 2017-11-12 04:09:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/486521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/micehell/pseuds/micehell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The pain won't matter in the end.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Almost

**Author's Note:**

> Not one of the happiest fics ever written for someone's birthday, no. ;)

The spoon lay on the floor, the tiny pool of brown liquid in its bowl - looking like bile, like melted shit, like sugar and cinnamon and ecstasy combined - congealing in the cool air.

Renton focuses on the spoon as Sick Boy pushes into him. He stares at it, almost wanting it more than he does… wanting it more… fuck, almost more than he does the comfort of Sick Boy's hands, shaking and cold, on his shoulders, his hips. Another thrust, and Renton bites back the _godpleasestop_ that's right behind his teeth. The pain won't matter in the end.

Sick Boy moves his hands, resting one on the floor and using the other to hold himself tight to Renton's back, hunching over him, his face pressing in against Renton's shoulder. Renton feels the liquid - warm from Sick Boy's eyes, cool as it trickles away, like love and pain combined - on his skin. He hears the whispered mantra that comes with every thrust - _make me forget, make me forget, make me forget_ \- and he pushes back into them, needing the scrape of flesh inside him that's as good as… almost as good as… as good as the deepest high.

He hears Sick Boy choke out his release - satiated, joyless, and nowhere near enough to forget - and Renton jacks his own cock, once, twice, and it's enough to come, shaking.

Sick Boy pulls out of him, dropping to the floor. Renton spoons behind him, holding Sick Boy tightly as he mourns the lives - Sick Boy's, his, Baby Dawn's - they've thrown away. He could almost wish… could wish… fuck, could almost wish he'd never heard of heroin.

Renton stares at the spoon even as he holds Sick Boy close.

/ficlet


End file.
